Don't make out with my wife yet
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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