Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
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