We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
