now i know why i became what i already was.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
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