I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
