dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Randomize