when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
