its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
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