I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
she pinky promised me she was 18
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
