Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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