if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
And the cops told us we were all naked.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
