Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize