would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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