very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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