can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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