So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
there is glitter all over my balls
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
