(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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