Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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