We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
