Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Dick very happy bro
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Randomize
