Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
