It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
