You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Randomize
