She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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