Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
50% drunk capacity currently
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
