She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Randomize
