exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
