i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize
