if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
North Korea, Best Korea!
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Randomize