Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
