Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize
