How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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