ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
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