White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize