I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
