There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
