Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize