I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
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