i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize
