omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Randomize
