saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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