I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
