I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize