hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
