I wannas sexs uuuuu
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Randomize