i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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