turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize