Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(478): View more from Georgia

There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.

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(817): View more from Texas

I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.

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(361): View more from Texas

I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body

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(787): View more from Puerto Rico

Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.

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(313): View more from Michigan

Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.

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(856): View more from New Jersey

I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was

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(718): View more from New York

Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”

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