I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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