is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
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