We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Randomize
