someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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