To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
